Thursday, 7 April 2011

Call for assistance

The following was all part of the Portal 2 ARG that we participated in and is not really important any longer. Keeping it for historical reasons.

So I just awoke to what can only be described as manic giggling and intense keyboard mashing. First thinking it was hallucinations caused by recent days' fumes I ignored it. But it would not go away and I finally went up to investigate. What I found was that my desk was spattered with fresh blood and mucus, something I spent the last minutes cleaning up with high pressure hose (we installed one after the "Sottoth-incident").

Anyhow, this can only mean that one of the old specimens, subject H, has escaped once again. How he did manage to pick the lock without any fingers boggles the mind. I guess he always did have dexterous feet though. Once we catch him there will no more of that though.

In any case, if anybody spots strange messages on the forum or whatnot, please ignore them and just report back to me or anyone at FG. I assure you anything that subject H says is all just a mad animal's ramblings. Nothing to take any note of. Would be great if you all could help me catch the bugger.

Oh, well time for placing some bear traps I guess!

PS: Good news from Razer, looks like the problems are fixed now. To all those that have reported missing limbs: we are working on finding (somewhat) fresh replacements!

PSS: What in god's name is that in my shoes!!!


  1. What can change the nature of a potato?

  2. I have bear traps.

    Buy from me.


    Then again frictional is very good at doing those two things so im not surprised... :p

  4. Most unusual post from you guys. I'll keep my eyes open for this creature. :)

  5. Hehehe, looks like the Potato Sack Bundle has been a success.

  6. So HELPr isn't a troll, told those wiki guys but they needed proof. Thanks!

  7. Francis York Morgan8 April 2011 at 05:54

    I have spent all day trying to figure this out...
    My brain hurts

  8. "What can change the nature of a potato?"


    Digestive tract? What comes out is not a potato (technically).

    Crisps aren't potato-natured either...


    Actually, it depends on what you name as the defining characteristic of a potato. What exactly is the nature of a potato?

    (OMG, that was so deep...)

  9. Good news:

    Subject should be found shortly now that its main feet-ures are gone..hehe

    I knew those croco-cats experiments would pay off somehow!

  10. Head of the EU (Exploration into the Unknown) society
    eagerly awaits to see your next report concerning the
    lengthy and comprehensive studies we are sure you'll be
    performing on the specimen in question.

    May you require any support and/or resources, feel free to
    entrust us with the task to supply them.

    Hamilton. P. Lehman

  11. Sharks with head-mounted lasers work really well in catching the legless.

  12. Not on dry land!!!

    OMG, OMG, OMG!
    Maybe subject H tried to communicate again? One post here looks particularly suspicious...

  13. I think they are saying there is a Hacker in the forums. Subject "H"?


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